Wednesday, June 15, 2005
i dunno wad to say...
it's like wad-the-hell-am-i-feeling-like-that...
i hate myself more than ever...
i hate liar...i've been lying to myself that i finally started to feel guilty to myself.
funny,right? haiz...
damn depressing...pardon my language...might juz end up with all these in my current post...
arghz...saw him at lunch and that's it...
there's too many thing to say...but i din wanna blog about it le...
depressing stuffs...juz wanna forget all about it...
act blur, act innocent...
i'm juz going to be good now...
everything on the dot le...
no more dragging of these and thats...
so in the meantime, if i gave any f***-up face, i'm sorry and all i can say is, it's juz too bad, your luck to bump into me now.
anybody asking me out...(or maybe no one will), no more night outings in the meantime...
weekdays, appointment 3days beforehand(school days).
weekends, one and a half week roughly, 10 days in advance.
special cases like my shifu, my dear dear, 10 minutes in advance if i'm available at that moment.
feel crappy now...
wanna juz fall into somebody's arm and cry all over again but he wasnt here...wanna make somebody feel that i care but i'm hurt myself too...wanna do lots of things but i got not much chance to...wanna be with somebody but my timing sux...wanna run away from reality but it's not the best method...wanna hurt myself mentally...but it's called silly...i'm juz not myself...let me juz go into the unreal fairyland...
juz let me be a kid...for once...
let me cry mentally...for another time...
if u bother to care, a short sms would have made me feel better...
i'm not asking much...
i juz want a lil more attention, a lil more communication...
or maybe i'm juz someone who's too depending on people...
oh well...maybe, perhaps...
i might not be the gal u wanted me to be...
perhaps...i'm juz too selfish to love you this much...
perhaps, i'm juz someone whom no one understands...
not even myself...
dar, i miss you....but what can i do?nothing.
Blogged
@ 6:11 PM
always thinking -
