hmm...not a perfect day today but well,life goes on.
bleahz..
haha...
hmm, was suppose to meet Jos today for lunch date de...but as usual, he overslept...
got pretty disappointed, i would say...
juz cant smile for the whole afternoon...
then...i found out he bought my favourite harry!!!
NOT the kid version...oh manz...wad can i say??

but still, i didnt eat any lunch today...
was actually wanting to make him feel guilty, but instead i felt more kiddish than ever...
haiz, poor stomach...must have suffered today. =P haha

accompany him to his workplace again...
am juz glad that i see him today, at least the storm is clearing...
and i feel better now...

harry, here i comes. wahhaha...
miss ya, dearie
Blogged @ 9:11 PM
always thinking -

hmm...went to cck part today, took some picture for my project.
then went to lot 1, trying to find my harry potter. but all i see is the children' version. so i did not buy.
accompanied sakeenah to jurong station then i went to cwp to meet dar.
sad lah, the popular there under renovation so i went to bishan to hear this, "out of stock"

nevertheless, i had a talk with dar...and i feel better now.
at least, i found back my stand.
at least, i'm not so lost now.

=)

harry potter...wherever are you??
dear, i miss you...

i'm sorry but my stand is clear.
Blogged @ 8:42 PM
always thinking -

my common test week is over and all...
juz wanna slack now...
been chatting with a fren these few days.
good to hear he's well and all...

aw...my freshie wanna organise outing again...
juz to cheer my fren up...perhaps i should go...if everything is well plan ba.

juz got the msg that i'll be involved in yet another lsct event!
staffs and students day is coming!
well, perhaps didnt get into the main comm is still not bad afterall...
maybe...
well, ten of us got selected to choose some good-looking gals and guys from lsct this august.
and i'm going to choose and look at guys, well, openly, i would say.
*oops* =P

hmm, sheryl is inside too...
but a good fren. yup, he went in as well... fated lah.
ew, wonder if you'll read this, but ya anyway...
dream is something that might not be realistic.
you can dream, i can also be part of your dream but it is not a reality now.
maybe you can say, i'm vulnerable even now when i'm attached ba.

juz so hope you'll pay a lil more attention to me...a lil more.
i dont wanna lose you neither do i want to lose myself in this mess.
oh my gosh...and plus dun ask me to comment what happen outside my blog.
i wouldnt speak.
i only wanna hear. your comments and all.

dearie, i miss you.
=)
Blogged @ 2:00 PM
always thinking -

to add on... thanks, Lee Hong, Pamela, katherine, teresa, shu chyi, sakeenah.
thanks for the sms-es. and special thanks to atirah and sakeenah, for the ""treats"". haha
Blogged @ 10:18 PM
always thinking -

firstly wanna say thank you to all peeps out there.
thanks for remembering.

thanks for the prezzies...
from my dar, my gal, my colleague, my ex-classmates.
and all frenz who wishes me.

woke up late today...quite late.
switched on my phone and saw a number of sms-es.
first from my dar, then from my nivla, my lynn, my god-bro.
then forum includes, nivla again, joel, benjamin, zhiyi, yibin, jason, geraldine, SC, ken, ron
thanks peeps.
plus my dear Ms Ngu for her letter.
Ling ling for the sms-es juz now. haha
Atirah from MSN. heez

my 17th year had juz flew off...
going to be exact 18 yr old in an hour plus...which is the exact timing.
=P

life's beautiful...
thanks to my dar, my honey, my dear, my best frenz, my ex-classmates, my current classmates, my frenz, my colleagues, my family... i love you peeps.
to bits...
love you the the end of time. =)
Blogged @ 6:33 PM
always thinking -

eh, just wanted to post....
hmm...wanna say thank you to all frenz out there.
been nearly 18 years of my life and though i would say i did not or will not receive as much presents as before, but sth struck me real hard this year especially.

i receive my 1st present from my dar.
and oh my gosh, i couldn't believe this manz.
i got my wil wil's new album. plus =X sth else. haha. love my dear dear to bits man.
bought my fav. and he didnt even got jealous when buying them. wahahaha.
=P
then today, YC came down all the way to my workplace to pass me my prezzie.
and i love it man. it's so cool...he came down all the way...maybe also bcoz of arcade but still nevertheless...i was at a loss of words. PMK shirt! PINK. hahaha

then sth else came...i open my letter box today and i saw one letter for me!!
my beloved Ms Ngu, my once teacher.
oh manz, she remembered my birthday.
feeling touched...really.
i believed that all these gifts sent were priceless.
and wad made them priceless was my frenz.
and i believed that these frenz are my angels.
they're the best gifts ever. nothing could replace them in my heart.
i love you, frenz.

dear, i miss you
Blogged @ 10:47 PM
always thinking -

went back to school on wednesday to do abit of studying...but ya, as usual, only manage to get the first bit of facts in when there's so few of us around.
find it harder to concentrate when there' s more ppl. haha...

guess dar was really tired, he fell asleep, shouldn't go inot details if not he's gonna get me. =P
haha.

hmm, then went to work ytd with abang. suddenly feel like calling him abang. seems closer ba.
gonna miss him real lots when he leaves...ytd was the last day i'm working with him...he juz got transferred...
and my mei mei manager came back...as usual he looks more pretty thab before....wahaha...so girl girl sia.
hopefully, nth goes wrong when he's around ba, anyway he's quitting. this month gonna be the last month...
haiz...he came back to our store, so abang gotta go...and now he's quitting and abang cant come back.
rather sad sia...

gonna be common test next week le...die....haiz...autocad not done too...didnt know how to do...
argh...

miss you, dearie...didnt see you since wednesday...been 2 days...
*hugs*
when will i see you again?? =(
Blogged @ 9:54 PM
always thinking -

ytd was the grad day for my seniors, went and help out.
it's so formal. we're all wearing blazer...heez..
and gals with heels...
guys with tie.
haha...well, was super tired...
feets aching...but nevertheless...still went out witht he seniors to fish & co.
haha...then went esplanade. =P
had a great day with them plus having dar around.
been sometime since i hang out at night...
was so rare to see me "dating" at night too...
haha...

miss you, dearie.
lots...gonna miss u like many days again...
wonder when will we be seeing each other again before school re-open...
argh...love kills all yet love heals all too...^_^
Blogged @ 12:04 PM
always thinking -

spend my thurday in school till 8+ to study abit and to have my dear accompany-ing me.
haha, really really miss those moments with you.
havent seen you since thursday itself...
missing you real badly...

went to work tosay as usual, was suppose to end at 6, but my colleague didnt turn up so i got extended till 7.30...was super shagged...stayed in the kitchen to do setter...
the order juz came continuously and i had so many things else to cope.
*back aches*
came home around 8...
shall start studying from monday ba, slack a while...
been some time since i get to slack...
though all the while hasn't been studying as well... was juz bz with things around me, i guess.
haha, well...
the worst had past...should live back my life...
so wad if i didnt get my wish, it's not always so smooth in life....
i'm juz given a test in my life...that's all...
haha..

miss you, honey.
lots..
Blogged @ 9:12 PM
always thinking -

My day was shitty today... really...*sighz*
What is life manz?
my dream had crashed and there goes my wish as well...
am damn disappointing...damn sad...
arghz...

to my frenz out there:
i'm sorry to disappoint you.
i did not get into the main comm even though u peeps took a trip down especially for me.
i really appreciated it, am touched.
cried a few times but i'll be fine soon.
am sure i'll get back on the track and be stronger this time.

to my dar:
i'm sorry to disappoint you too.
know u put in more effort in getting ur frenz to vote.
and plus today, it juz wasnt my day and i'm like so down, couldnt cheer up anymore than cry.
it wasnt ur fault, i should have learn to be alone sooner or later.
to face my own prob, to carry my own burden.
shouldnt have made u feel bad about urself.
the question you asked me juz made me feel worse.

and now, wad's so shitty today??
first, i didnt meet dar to school as planned.
second, i waited for quite some time alone juz for my frenz to accompany me for lunch.
third, there's cockroaches at where we're eating. so damn yucky.
fourth, i was late for class.
fifth, i couldnt do my test.
sixth, i couldnt finish my test.
seventh, i spilled my lab test tube content.
eighth, i got pissed off with my frenz for a moment.(i know they are pissed off too) am sorry.
ninth, i found out i wasnt in the main comm.
tenth, the bus was super slow.
eleventh, made my dar feel bad, damn bad although it wasnt his fault and it's mine instead.
twelvth, i couldnt bring myself to smile anymore...
all bcoz of my dream went crashing, my life juz feel so dead all at the moment...
this is how shitty my day is today...
imagine??

and sth to comment, i juz realise the voting system might juz be unfair, maybe cuz i din get in then i finally see the light ba. the whole main comm only comprise of BIO and BMS.
wth, wtf.
isnt life cruel?
should have send myself to nyp, get one dumb course for myself that no one likes, no one wants.
maybe i'll juz have my life in black and white.
colourless? perhaps, i shouldnt have frenz, perhaps i wont bring any burden to ppl then.
perhaps, i wont feel sad though i wont be happy.
perhaps, i should be isolated.
my life has juz been cut off for today all bcoz of one silly dream i set myself since i step into my poly.
one silly cca bcoz of someone i used to like.
although, my life is now colourful but every now and then, i feel sad, i feel hurt.

to the someone i used to like:
i know i'm plain silly...
i know i couldnt think each time i saw u.
i juz turn dumb.
i wanted to hate u but i hate myself more each time.
juz hated it...i should have vanished ba.

to my dar:
u know how i feel, my heart and mind belongs to you.
till the day u leave me, you know i wont leave you.
i love you the way u love me. maybe not more, but i know i love you all the same, and not any lesser.
miss you lots and i'm sorry for today.
*bows* sorry.
*hugs* i love you.
Blogged @ 9:16 PM
always thinking -

had been thinking if this since i met my friend this morning to school...
i've been slacking too much this semester...
thing isnt going like i wanted to be when i first stepped into NP.
maybe i should have kept reminding myself...
maybe should have get friends to remind me not to slack as well...
my results so far are still alright, it's juz that the term tests are coming, and i'm not even prepared at all.

anyway, i'm in class now, see wad the hell am i in here?? slacking~ hahaha


honey, i miss you.
Blogged @ 9:10 AM
always thinking -

i got sth to say after visiting my cca forum...
read some posts about the nomination thingy and it suddenly saddens me...
not that i'm in pms..haha, but i know what mades me sad...
it dawns on me that of all people who apply for the main comm thingy, not all wanted to get in.
some submitted their forms all bcoz of one word "try".
what does it means? "try"
i find myself turning cold towards these idea of trying all boz it seems fun and the person may not get in afterall.
cold not bcoz i dun like ppl who try.
but it's the aftermath of it.
when somebody who try doesnt get wad they wanted to try for, they can/may get upset over it.
but one thing i wanna argue in defence is that if you're juz trying, no point getting angry when u din get in.
everybody have their dreams, though not always succeeding in getting wad they want, but it's still afterall a dream that might happen someday.
no offence for the above post, plus no arrowing to anybody.
juz that it hurts me when i kept reading the forum post related to this topic...

anyway, i got thru the nomination, that's why i have such feeling for it...
it's always my dream to join lsct as a cca, i wanted to be part of them like a main comm thingy...
not that i have high ambition, but i really wanted it...
it's a dream for me.
even if i din get in eventually, i know i've come that far.
i know i'll be sad, i know i'll be disappointed but i know i've did my best for my dream.

from another view,
if i get in, i'm pretty sure somebody will be worried for me...
one, there's someone inside.
two, it's too politcal from outside view.
three, i might juz commit to lsct more than anything.

but if i do get in,
i'm sure i'll lurve myself more than ever.
it made me feel that there's really this family in my heart.
i'll commit to it more than anything.
i'll make sure i wont go power-thirsty in there.
i'll still make time out for my dearest.

you know how much i lurve you.
do trust me.
believe in me.
i miss you badly, real badly.
been 27 hr since i heard you, seen you, felt you.
Blogged @ 9:00 PM
always thinking -

juz had this idea in my mind...
my wishlists for the coming 18th birthday plus my wishlist for my future...haha
juz daydreaming away and i hope it'll come thru...

before 18th birthday-->i wanna get into lsct main comm
before 21st birthday-->i wanna know how to drive
before 23rd birthday-->i wanna go university
before 26th birthday--> i wanna get married!
before 30th birthday--> i wanna have kids!

wahaha...this is hiliarious...
i'm juz trying to kill my emptiness...
my longing for a truth
my longing hope that it's not real
my longing that we still love each other as a family...
to my mum, dad, bro.:
i love you!
really. i swear...i really lurve you...
*sobz*

haiz...well...shall end off here...
Blogged @ 8:29 PM
always thinking -